“Love is something you do for someone else, not something you do for yourself. – Doctor Gary Chapman, author of The Five Love Languages”
When it comes to expressing love, everybody has their unique ways on how to express. Understanding these languages of love can help us to communicate, it can be the way we speak, the way we comfort, the way we spend time with them, and how can we build a strong connection for a harmonious relationship.
This hearts month, we are going to reflect on “The Five Love Languages” by Doctor Gary Chapman. He identifies the five primary ways in which people express and how they experience love.
What are these five love languages?
- Words of Affirmation
- Acts of Service
- Receiving Gifts
- Quality Time
- Physical Touch
Oh boy, I think you are now getting the idea of which of these five love languages you are, but to further understand it let’s explain it even deeper shall we?
Words of Affirmation
First, of the five languages, Words of Affirmation is a language where we express our affection through spoken or written words, compliments, and appreciation. Through this type of love language, you make the person think that they are valued, understood, and appreciated through words. We must express appreciation and tell it to them positively, Encouraging them and supporting them. I am a very talkative person, I always give them compliments and appreciation.
Acts of Service
Second, of the five love languages, if words of affirmation are expressing our affection through words, this type of language is showing your actions, no matter how big or small you did, it may be doing chores, offering help, doing laundry, cooking, and other things is an act of service. It is also important to value your partner’s wants, and always be aware of what your partner needs. Whenever they would not believe what I said to them, I always show them my actions are true and I have good intentions.
Receiving Gifts
Receiving Gifts is a kind of language where we give physical items to strengthen connection. Just like acts of service, it is not about how big or small the gift or the price is but the gesture of receiving is an act that we appreciated the effort of the person that gave the gift. It is even more meaningful if the gift that you receive is Sentimental, Surprise, or Occasional, Based on experience, I am fond of receiving gifts and treasuring them and keeping them because I appreciate people making an effort to know what are my favorites and simple surprises.
Quality Time
Spending time is the best time to spend it with you, quality time is an act where you are being appreciated for having time with you, by doing things with you, having the time to check you, and a time where the two of you are alone. I experienced this one way back when I was in my third year of college, I met this girl, and all the time I wanted to spend time with her just to let her know that I would spend a little bit of time just to be with her. In short, we are making an effort by using time.
Physical Touch
The last and final love language of Doctor Gary Chapman, Physical Touch, is an act where the person makes contact with another person’s body, this may be hugs, holding hands, cuddling, playing with hair, and kissing. According to some people’s experiences, when people are doing physical touch like hugging or massaging with their companions, they feel relieved and relaxed because they are with someone that they know.
Love language is just like any other language that we speak, we are learning it and understanding it, it is the best way on how we can communicate and understand our companions and friends. Remember, showing affection is not for couples but it can also be showing gratitude to your friend that we treasured and loved.
So I think you already know the importance of what love language is and how is it very important. I would like to hear what your love language is, please do share, and see you next time.
